Crossposted from Left Toon Lane, Bilerico Project & My Left Wing


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see more Lolcats and funny pictures

see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Crossposted from Left Toon Lane, Bilerico Project & My Left Wing


click to enlarge

Crossposted from Left Toon Lane, Bilerico Project & My Left Wing


click to enlarge

kittehs

The train pulled out of Sirkeci Station at 10pm sharp, bound for Bucharest. Within an hour the slow rocking of the train put me to sleep. Sometime around 300am the train stopped, the conductor rapped on the door, shouting "immigration" and the passengers filed out in a stupor. Passport stamped I climbed aboard and went back to sleep. Thirty minutes later there was another sharp rap on the door: "customs!" The officers tore my cabin apart, like cops back home with a warrant. Finally, after fifteen minutes of pillage they left, satisfied there was no contraband in my meager belongings. I fell alseep, only to be awakened again thirty minutes later by a huge, semi-toothed Bulgarian border officer. "Passport?"

I handed it over. He glanced at it long enough to realize I was American, snorted and handed it back. "Okay," he said, "good night."

"That was easy enough," I thought and went right back to sleep. I don't know how much time passed, but once again, I was awakened by a hard thump, followed by two quick knocks on my door, like rapid gunshots.

"What now!" I exclaimed in frustration.

"Eet iz passport kontrol," came a woman's voice behind the door. I fumbled with the lock on my door as images of a snaggle-toothed, heavy Bulgarian matron danced through my head. I flipped on the light, and slid open the door.

More after the jump.

Charlie Brooker | June 1 | The Guardian

..I for one welcome our titted overlords..

Women - why aren't you running the world yet? Frankly I'm disappointed in you. Men are still far too dominant for their own good, and consequently we've made a testosterone-sodden pig's ear of just about everything: politics, the economy, religion, the environment ... you name it, it's in a gigantic man-wrought mess. The world's been one big dick-swinging contest, and we've caught our collective glans in a nearby desk fan. By rights we should be squealing for your help, but we're not, because we're too damn stupid and too damn proud. We swagger convincingly, and that's about it. And swaggering's fine for scraping by in primitive times, but the world we've built is altogether more complex now. We've got stock exchanges and nuclear warheads. It's too easy to swagger your way into big trouble without even realising. Well, we've had our turn. It's time for the Rise of the Ladies. more :D

kittehs

The Onion - Calling it an essential step toward securing the Texas border and protecting his people's way of life, Gov. Rick Perry announced Tuesday the completion of a 1,953-mile wall designed to keep out millions of unwanted Americans.

According to Perry, the 75-foot-high barricade running along the northern boundary is the culmination of more than 160 years of escalating tensions between Texas and the United States. Though a protective barrier has been under consideration for decades, the Texas Legislature voted unanimously to begin construction on the project immediately following the 2008 presidential election.

"As governor, it is my responsibility to do whatever's necessary to maintain the territorial integrity of Texas," Perry told reporters during a press conference held inside a sniper tower overlooking Oklahoma. "If you are a Texas citizen, you shouldn't have to worry about some American coming in here, using your goods and services, and taking away your job."

plus

Guantánamo Closure Delayed

"Maybe if we leave it open just one more week, we'll find out if they did it."

Just in from American Free Press.
I love the adverts at the bottom of the page, Gideons, Scriptures for America, Poem of the Man God, Miracles of St Joseph...

AFP’s (heh ~graham) editor crashed the secret meeting of the global elite and uncovered some scary schemes.

Bilderberg boys are a bunch of grumpy old men but remain fiercely dedicated to usurping sovereignty in the United States and throughout the world. Patriots can celebrate their setbacks but never let up: Bilderberg still threatens the sovereignty of all nations while fighting for world government.

The Guardian, By Tim Dowling, May 21

Warning: the 20-year-old Global Positioning System (GPS) that makes your car satnav work could soon fail. GPS devices calculate your position using signals from four different orbiting satellites, and a minimum of 24 satellites is required to keep the network running. There are currently 31 in operation, but several are well past their life expectancy and a US Air Force programme to replace them is way behind schedule. This time next year, we might have to revert to old-fashioned maps to find our way - only some younger drivers will have no experience of this ancient method of navigation. So how do maps work? Space does not permit full written instructions, but here are some Frequently Asked Questions to get you started:

Crossposted from Left Toon Lane, Bilerico Project & My Left Wing


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United Nations | May 12

Reuters - The United States was elected to the U.N. Human Rights Council for the first time on Tuesday after the Obama administration reversed its predecessor's policy of boycotting the body.

Reuters - The administration of U.S. President Barack Obama has reversed the policy of his predecessor George W. Bush, who shunned the council as a forum for attacking Israel.

But Obama, who joined Israel and other countries in boycotting the council's widely condemned racism conference in Geneva last month, decided that the United States would run for a seat in a bid to improve the U.N. rights panel from within.

lol! cojones, yes

I'm not much of a chef. I bought a huge marinated pork loin from Costco, brought it home, cut it in half, wrapped it in tin foil, tossed it on my mom's propane grille, lit it up, set all three burners to high, then walked away to watch a Minnesota Twins baseball game on TV for a few minutes while the grille warmed up.

Just for a few minutes...

Tragically, it was a really exciting, dramatic baseball game. A real barn-burner. Twins won, and then I thought, "Oh shit. What about the pork loin?" I raced to the grille, whose thermometer was pegged at 550 degrees Fahrenheit.

For three hours. Oops.

Denise Grady | Urbana-Champaign | April 23

NYT - Scientists have achieved what they describe as a major milestone in animal genetics: decoding the genome of the cow.

The findings provide “tantalizing clues to explain ‘the essence of bovinity,’ ” according to an essay in the journal Science, which is publishing several articles on the work.

^{Caption courtesy Amanda Swaty Myers.}

I got nothing today. So, how about we make this post a Flame Fest. We haven't had one of those in a long time.

I know, it's not Friday yet, but the last few days have been torture difficult.

An update on the US financial crisis in Onion video here

Time, By John Wendle, April 15

Moscow - Police in Russia have long had a reputation for three things: bribery, cruelty and ineptitude. Now the government is determined to change that image by teaching police that taking drugs or bribes or befriending criminals are probably all bad ideas. At a time when protests are breaking out across the country over Moscow's handling of the financial crisis, the Ministry of Internal Affairs says it has drawn up a new code of conduct for the police and will distribute it to every officer by the end of 2009. The aim: to turn Russia's police into polished professionals.

The code goes into striking detail on how officers should behave both in public and private. Police, it says, should avoid casinos, "indiscriminate sex" and "questionable relationships with people with negative public reputations such as criminals." Drinking on duty, talking on cell phones on public transport, using drugs, offering or accepting bribes and engaging in "gross jokes and wicked irony" are also out.

Crossposted from Left Toon Lane, Bilerico Project & My Left Wing


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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY

If she were fat, she would be perfect.