The House that Jack Built


This is the house that Jack bought.

This is the mortgage that paid for the house that Jack bought.

This is the fraud, that the mortgage processor committed to get the loan, that paid for the house that Jack bought.

This is the bank, that dished off the loan, that was obtained by fraud, to pay for the house that Jack bought.

continued after the jump

This is the quant, who sliced up the loan, by fudging the numbers, so he could take the dished loan, that was obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, the Jack bought.

This is the dealer, who without checking the numbers, shipped off the tranches, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, that was obtained by fraud, to pay for the house that Jack bought.

This is the monoliner, that papered the tranches, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house that Jack bought.

This is the investment bank, that securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house that Jack bought.

This is hedge fund, that sold the Default Swap, that securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, that Jack bought.

This is the tax break, that fed to the hedge fund, that sold the Default Swap, that securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, that Jack bought.

This is deficit, caused by the tax breaks, that fed to the hedge fund, sold the Default Swap, that securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, that Jack bought.

This is the War, that ate up the money, that ballooned out the deficit, caused by the tax breaks, that fed to the hedge fund, sold the Default Swap, that securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, that Jack bought.

This is the downturn, that followed the War, that ate up the money, that ballooned out the deficit, caused by the tax breaks, that fed to the hedge fund, sold the Default Swap, that securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, that Jack bought.

This is the takedown, that accelerated the downturn, that followed the War, that ate up the money, that ballooned out the deficit, caused by the tax breaks, that fed to the hedge fund, sold the Default Swap, that securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, that Jack bought.

This is the pink slip, because of the Takedown, that accelerated the downturn, that followed the War, that ate up the money, that ballooned out the deficit, caused by the tax breaks, that fed to the hedge fund, sold the Default Swap, that securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, that Jack bought.

This is Jack's layoff, that is on the pink slip, because of the Takedown, that accelerated the downturn, that followed the War, that ate up the money, that ballooned out the deficit, caused by the tax breaks, that fed to the hedge fund, sold the Default Swap, that securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, that Jack bought.

This is the foreclosure, brought on by Jack's layoff, that is on the pink slip, because of the Takedown, that accelerated the downturn, that followed the War, that ate up the money, that ballooned out the deficit, caused by the tax breaks, that fed to the hedge fund, sold the Default Swap, that securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, that Jack bought.

This is the Fed, that bollixed the policy, to deal with the foreclosure, brought on by Jack's layoff, that is on the pink slip, because of the Takedown, that accelerated the downturn, that followed the War, that ate up the money, that ballooned out the deficit, caused by the tax breaks, that fed to the hedge fund, sold the Default Swap, that securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, that Jack bought.

This is the Congress, that backed up the Fed, that bollixed the policy, to deal with the foreclosure, brought on by Jack's layoff, that is on the pink slip, because of the takedown, that accelerated the downturn, that followed the War, that ate up the money, that ballooned out the deficit, caused by the tax breaks, that fed to the hedge fund, sold the Default Swap, that securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, that Jack bought.

This is Bush, they still let him fuck things up. Maybe it would have been different if he had been impeached. We will never know, now will we.

I don't know about you, but Jack is looking pretty fucked right now.


Stirling Newberry December 24, 2008 - 4:48am
( categories: Miscellany )

I don't think anyone has put the chain of events together as well as this.

I'm going to take it that the monoline insurers incorporate as well the ratings agencies who sprinkled holy water over all these securities.

I guess I'm equally impressed with all the trouble gone to find links to the chain. I'm not surprised there is no link for George W. Bush. I wouldn't know which of dozens of images to choose from. I might have gone with him and the turkey, but the recent shoe-throwing incident may be his lasting legacy.

Numerian December 24, 2008 - 5:56am

but one sometimes has to make a mean between completeness and the poetry of absurdity.

Stirling Newberry December 24, 2008 - 12:57pm

military pork causes us to rely on unnatural profits.

mrmx December 24, 2008 - 8:41pm

the regulators who turned a blind eye, the deregulators that made the policy possible, and the failed socio-economic philosophy that started the whole thing in the first place. This was a systemic failure that was preventable.

tjfxh December 24, 2008 - 1:38pm

It places the items within a context that makes it understandable to the less sophisticated like me who struggle to explain any of it to anyone else.

Jeff Wegerson December 24, 2008 - 2:17pm

flashback
i haz it

Lesly December 24, 2008 - 5:01pm

Though I think you're missing a link (maybe so obvious it can go unsaid):

This is the bank, that, collecting its fee, dished off the loan, that was obtained by fraud, to pay for the house that Jack bought.

This is the quant, who, collecting their fee, sliced up the loan, by fudging the numbers, so he could take the dished loan, that was obtained by fraud, to pay for the house, the Jack bought.

This is the dealer who, collecting their fee, without checking the numbers, shipped off the tranches, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, that was obtained by fraud, to pay for the house that Jack bought.

This is the monoliner, that, collecting their fee, papered the tranches, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house that Jack bought.

This is the investment bank, that, collecting their fee, securitized the the foreclosure, shipped off by the dealer, with the the quant's fudged up numbers, from the dished out loan, obtained by fraud, to pay for the house that Jack bought.

As Roubini would say, if he were a blogger, it's all about the fees, baby!

lambert December 24, 2008 - 5:44pm

Brill, absolutely. And in perfect meter, too!

Merry Holidays, Stirling.

mommybrain December 25, 2008 - 1:56am

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