Child Support .

Q: the fact that I don't feel I need his money, I decided not to seek child support. Recently I have found out that he walks around saying I blamed him, that he is not the bio. father. He knows deep down that he is. I also found out that he now has a well paying job. He spends all his money on himself, buying all kinds of gold jewelry and expensive shoes. Let me say I have never met anyone so self absorbed in my life! All this makes me want to seek child support, I guess out of spite. I ask myself, why shouldn't he live up to his responsibilities. I could put the money away for my son's education. It is my intentions not to spank my child, but I know he would, because I have seen him discipline his own nephew that way while babysitting. If he spanks my child this will undermine the method of discipline I use. Knowing him, he would probably use my son as a 'babe magnet' as some man posted earlier as advice to another man (that's disgusting by the way, and just shows that you don't have enough charm of your own). Also, I may have to move out of province or to the US to find a job once I graduate from Teacher College, doesn't visitation limit you from doing this?

A:It's not worth it!! It doesn't sound like this guy is your image of the father that you would want for your child, so do your child AND yourself a favor and walk away from this man. Sure, it sucks to see him with all of this money while you're struggling, but at least you're not having to struggle with him, too. If you sue him for support, chances are that he is going to get really angry and retaliate by asking for visitation and possibly even partial custody (why not, he's paying for it , right?) and the courts see that he pays his support, he's not an axe murderer, so why not? It could get really ugly.(trust me) Hey, you're a new mom, if you gave him the choice whether or not to be in this child's life, then you must have been prepared to go it on your own, enjoy the time with your son and don't force him into the picture if he's not a willing participant because you'll end up with a father that doesn't have your child's best interest at heart. If you had the strength to make the decision to have this child knowing you were going to be a single mom, then you have the strength to ignore the initial satisfaction of a little bit of money that you may or may not get, and wait for the RIGHT father for your son to come along. It will happen.

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