Postpartum Depression Support???
Q: Does anyone know of any net groups where postpartum depression is
discussed OR did/do you suffer from it and would you like to talk
about it? I never imagined that I could feel so frightened about
being a mommy. We can't afford a psychiatrist, but even if we could,
I think I would find it more helpful to speak with others having the
same experience.
A:Congratulations on the birth of your daughter! Okay, my son was born 16
months ago but I definitely remember the post partum depression I went
through at first. I knew all about it, but I guess I didn't REALLY expect
it. I had an uneventful pregnancy and a fairly easy, short birth. But I
think the overwhelmingness of the whole situation, coupled with trying to
physically recover from birth, figure out how to take care of this new
creature, and being incredibly tired, plus whatever role hormones play,
really threw me for a loop. I was crying at everything--commercials, soap
operas, magazine articles, you name it. Even happy things. I just felt like
a bundle of raw emotions! I also had a baby who wanted to be held
CONSTANTLY or he cried, and there were a few days when my husband would
come home and we'd both be in tears. It really did pass though, after a few
months. What helped me was trying to put it in perspective and recognize it
for what it was, and realize that it WOULD pass. Also try following the
other standard advice like resting when you can, and not being alone if
that is helpful to you. I started making lunch dates with all my friends at
work so I'd at least have a reason to get going and leave the house! (and
many times it took till noon to get our acts together).
I bet there are a lot of new mothers on this news group who will write to
you with the same feelings. You know when you have a baby that it's going
to be hard, but I don't think we REALLY realize it till it happens. I was
ready for the physical aspect of it, but the emotional part was surprising.
I hope you have a support group that you can rely on, and that you're able
to catch some rest whenever you can. I spent a lot of nights anticipating
Jackson's next feeding, like a dummy, when I could've been sleeping!
You are a VERY new mommy! What you are feeling right now
is totally normal! In fact-I'm impressed you had the energy to seek help so
soon! I was barely able to move or speak for 3 weeks-not due to physical
pain but overwhelming depression! I felt confused, disoriented, exhausted,
and terrified! All I did was hold my baby and cry! I was overwhelmed with
the incredible feeling of love and responsibility I wanted to give her. I
also mourned the loss of my husband and I just being "the 2 of us."
Then, exactly 3 weeks after Paige was born, I suddenly felt a lot better.
However, I did have some weird phobis for about 5 months-I went through
feeling as though someone was going to kidnap her during the night (I even
set up booby traps!!) ; I worried constantly that she was going to get hurt
by something outside of my control (natural disaster, car accident, etc.)
I just about went to my doctor for help, but things started to subside. Some
people say you aren't quite yourself until after the first year, and now that
she's 15 months, I finally am myself again. (more actually-I still have 25
lbs to lose!)
Hang in there-I hope you find the support you need. Talking with others is
often my best therapy-so feel free to e-mail me with anything. Don't be
afraid to go to your doctor-I actually wish I had. Also remember your
hormones are CRAZY right now, and so soon after birth it would probably be
weird if they weren't!
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